HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MUMMY!!

its the first mother's day without you oma..but i do hope u like the variety of flowers at ur grave..actually by now we;re still outside eating dinner walking around and enjoying the time together..but at least i know u are always right beside me..missed ya today!!

somehow i don't feel that u are gone anymore..the feeling i have now is like u went traveling with ah mah for a long time to take a break and not coming back yet..and left us to daddy..and not the same feeling as i have during the wake..somehow i can smile and play with my friends and feel not depressed because of this feeling i have..but sometimes i do get emo-ed and that sudden feeling disappeared..leaving me to feel that lost i have..its just so difficult to explain it in words but i guess u do get what i meant..its like somehow i feel that u are still alive instead of "sleeping underground"..but i do agree sometimes i feel that u are sleeping and get emo over it..but who cares..its how i express my love for u..its like everywhere is celebrating mother's day..still not fitting in..but i made alittle improvement today..i din cry when i'm at ur grave..i was able to smile and talk to u..able to smile and walk away..able to look back and walk away.. but the feeling of u leaving us has not totally subsided yet..when people still ask me serious things abt u..i still get teary.. anyways do u like the shells??